


Façade

by DoomedKelpie



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's
Genre: Depression, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-28
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:55:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25533964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoomedKelpie/pseuds/DoomedKelpie
Summary: Yusei is always cool, calm, and strong right? What if he isn't? What if it's all a façade? And... What if Jack finds out?
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

Yusei stared down at the small object in his hands. He wanted to throw the wretched thing away, but he couldn't. He held it up to the moonlight that shone through the window of the abandoned building he was in. The sharp metal surface glistened. Slowly, he rolled up one of the legs of his pants, revealing a pattern of lines all over his leg. He brought his knife to the skin. Allowing his cool façade to fall, he began to cry. Then he quickly dragged the blade across his leg, leaving a deep gash behind. He repeated the motion a few times before taking an old rag out of his pocket. He held it against the wounds until they stopped bleeding. After quickly wrapping a bandage around his leg and rolling his pants back down, the duelist stood.

XXX

The next day, as he was walking down the street, he suddenly tripped on a bag that had been left on the ground. Unable, to regain his balance, Yusei fell. With a sigh, he stood back up, but cursed once he realized a few of his cuts had reopened and blood was now seeping through his pants. He then continued walking to find a place to re-bandage his wounds. As he was about to enter an empty alleyway, he heard something.

"Oy, Yusei," a voice called.

The duelist turned to see Jack Atlas standing a few feet away.

"Jack," Yusei acknowledged.

"You're bleeding," he pointed out.

"I know," Yusei replied.

"You need to treat your wound," Jack told him.

"That's what I was going to do," Yusei said.

Suddenly, Jack grabbed Yusei's arm and started dragging him away.

"What are you doing?" Yusei asked.

"You can't treat a wound in a dirty alleyway," Jack told him. "It'll get infected."

Yusei pulled his arm out of Jack's grasp.

"I'm not stupid. I know how to keep a wound from getting infected," Yusei said, a little annoyance finding its way into his voice.

Jack sighed as he grabbed Yusei's arm again.

"Just accept my help," Jack ordered.

Jack then continued dragging him toward their destination with Yusei struggling to get away. However, Jack simply tightened his grip, preventing the other duelist from doing so. Eventually, Yusei gave up.

"Where are you dragging me?" he questioned.

"My apartment. I have a first-aid kit," Jack answered.

After realizing that Jack meant he was going to treat his wound, and thus see the cuts, Yusei froze.

"Let go of my arm," he told Jack.

"Stop whining," Jack ordered. "You can't ride a D-wheel with an injured leg."

"I just fell and scraped my knee," Yusei half-lied. "It's not going to stop me from dueling."

"That's a lot of blood for a scraped knee," Jack pointed out.

Despite Yusei's continued protests, Jack eventually dragged him into his apartment. He made Yusei sit on the couch while he retrieved the first aid kit. Upon his return, Jack tried to roll up Yusei's pants, causing Yusei to struggle again.

"No!" Yusei yelled at him.

Jack sighed in annoyance.

"Are you five years old?" he asked angrily. "Stop complaining."

Before Yusei could stop him, Jack rolled up his pants.

"What the hell…?" he said as he found that Yusei's leg was covered in bloody bandages.

Jack removed the bandages and froze when he saw the deep cuts hiding behind them.

"Yusei…," Jack trailed off.


	2. Chapter 2

Jack stared at the deep, red gashes going across Yusei's leg. Clearly, they weren't scrapes… They were definitely from something sharp. However, Jack had yet to put together what the wounds truly were.

"You did not just scrape your knee," the King pointed out. "How did you get these?"

Yusei refused to answer. With a sigh, Jack began to treat the other duelist's wounds as he thought about them. From Yusei's odd behavior and nature of the cuts, he could deduce that the wounds weren't an accident.

"Did someone do this to him?" Jack wondered.

Then, he glanced at Yusei's face. To his surprise, the duelist was dejectedly staring at the floor, and he was obviously holding back tears. Suddenly, a realization hit him.

"You did this to yourself," Jack stated, trying not to reveal his horror.

Yusei continued staring at the ground, refusing to answer.

"Yusei," Jack said. "Look at me."

When Yusei continued to stay silent, Jack grew angry. He grabbed Yusei's face and forced the duelist to look at him.

"Yusei!" he yelled. "This is serious! It can kill you!"

At this, Yusei couldn't hold his tears back any longer. As they started to stream down his cheeks, he let out a sob. Jack, who didn't know what to do, simply stared at the duelist as his façade completely crumbled.


	3. Chapter 3

Jack didn't know what to say after that. In all the time he had known the duelist, he had never seen Yusei flat-out sobbing like this. His anger quickly subsided and was replaced by worry. Eventually, Yusei's sobs quieted down, and this was when Jack found his words.

"Yusei, why would you do something like this?" he asked.

Yusei didn't answer, once again opting to stare at the floor. This time, however, Jack didn't get angry. Instead, he asked a new question.

"Do you want to die?" he asked quietly, his tone unreadable.

To the King's relief, Yusei shook his head negatively.

"Then why?" Jack asked again, clearly demanding an answer this time.

Yusei took a few deep breaths, preparing himself for what he was going to say.

"I don't know," he finally said.

This phrase brought back Jack's anger.

"You don't know?! Yusei, you're slicing up your leg! And you don't know why you're doing it?!" he yelled. "I wasn't joking, Yusei! Even if you aren't trying to die, this can kill you! And with how reluctant you were to get your wounds treated, I bet you wouldn't ask for help if they got infected! How could you not know why you're doing something this serious?!"

Yusei flinched at the words, knowing they were true.

"It's not that simple, Jack," Yusei explained quietly. "It isn't just one reason, or a few reasons. It's everything. Even small, stupid things build up, and before I know it, there's a knife in my hand. I really don't know why. Sometimes, nothing has even happened, and I was happy, and I still end up doing it. I. Don't. Know. Why."

By the end of what he was saying, tears were streaming down Yusei's cheeks once more. Jack was shocked by the response, and it made his worry grow. If there wasn't something to be solved, he didn't know how to get Yusei to stop.

"How long have you been doing this?" Jack questioned, already knowing he wouldn't like the answer.

"Since I was twelve…," Yusei replied, so quietly that Jack barely heard him.


	4. Chapter 4

While Jack had anticipated an unfavorable answer, he hadn't expected it to have been going on that long.

"Oh my God…," Jack gasped.

Yusei looked away, clearly ashamed. The duelists then sat in silence, neither one able to speak. After what seemed like hours, it was Jack who spoke.

"You know, you can't keep doing this," Jack told him.

"I can't stop, Jack," Yusei replied.

"I won't let you keep doing this," Jack said back.

"You can't stop me," Yusei retorted.

"Try me," Jack shot back, realizing that Yusei wasn't going to be cooperative.

Yusei tried to stand up and leave, but Jack grabbed onto his arm.

"Let go of me!" Yusei yelled at him, starting to get angry himself.

"Why? So you can go cut up your skin again?" Jack bit back.

"It's none of your business what I do!" Yusei shouted.

"No sane person would let you go off alone right now!" Jack argued.

"Shut up! You don't even know if I'm going to be alone or not! You don't know anything, Jack!" Yusei screamed. "Just because we dueled together doesn't mean we're suddenly friends again!"

Shocked at what Yusei had just said, Jack froze. Yusei took advantage of this to break out of Jack's hold and storm out of his apartment. Jack shook himself out of his brief daze and tried to follow Yusei, but he was fast and made it out of the building before Jack could stop him. So, unable to do anything and worried for someone who apparently didn't see him as a friend, he went back to his apartment and locked the door.


	5. Chapter 5

Jack flopped onto the couch with a sigh. He couldn't believe how much Yusei was able to hide. He and Yusei were still close back when they were twelve. He had never even suspected that Yusei would be doing something like this. Yusei's always been strong, calm, and collected. Before today, Jack had never seen Yusei sob so brokenly. He didn't seem like someone who would do this. Why would someone who values his friends above all else do something that would cause them so much pain if they knew? Why would such an amazing duelist and good person feel so horrible that they cut themselves?

"I can't believe this…," Jack muttered to himself.

Suddenly, Jack came to another realization. Yusei had sounded broken, but he was clearly angry at Jack as well. Yusei tried to befriend people even if they had harmed him. And yet, he said that Jack was not his friend.

"At least part of this is my fault…," Jack continued.

Jack continued his contemplations until a figure appeared in front of him.

"Atlas-sama?" Mikage questioned. "Are you alright? Why are there bloody bandages on the floor?"

"I'm fine," Jack answered back curtly.

"Atlas-sama, are you hurt?" the woman questioned, worried by the sight of the discarded bandages.

"No," he replied.

"Then why are there bloody bandages on the floor?" Mikage repeated.

"It's none of your business, so just let it go!" Jack yelled at her.

XXX

Yusei was once again in the abandoned building. Even though he had just done it, he had the knife in his hands again. The blood was already streaming down his leg like crimson rivers. He felt light-headed already, but he slashed across his skin again.

Jack now knew his biggest secret, one he never wanted anyone to know. To make matters worse, Yusei would have to face him again, knowing that Jack saw the marks on his flesh. He couldn't avoid the other duelist forever. And that would be sooner, rather than later, considering that he had to be in a tournament with him. The thought of the tournament brought back the thoughts of his friends. He hoped they were okay. They were so important to him, and if they were gone… Yusei had been lying to Jack a little. Most of the time, he wasn't sure of a definite reason for why he cut. What he told Jack was technically true. But the last time he did it, the time that produced the wounds Jack saw, he knew exactly what the reason was.

It was his friends.

Yusei sliced his flesh again, trying to push away his worries and fears, even if it was only for a little. Tears started to flow down his cheeks, adding clear rivers to the crimson.

He wouldn't back out of the tournament, even if that meant he had to face Jack.

He would protect his friends.


	6. Chapter 6

Yusei sat in the garden. The thoughts were swirling around his head, and no matter what he tried to do, he couldn't stop them. He had thought his friends were safe since he entered the tournament, but now they were in danger again. And this time, it wouldn't be as easy to save them, and now it was even more people's lives that rested on his shoulders. If he and the other signers can't defeat the dark signers, everyone in Satellite will die.

Yusei's hand clenched tightly, pulling at his newest wounds. He wanted to take out his knife, to pull up his sleeve, to slice the blade across his flesh. But he couldn't. He couldn't let himself get dizzy with blood loss or be distracted by pain during a duel. He had to stay completely focused on the task at hand.

As his thoughts started to get out of control, and he was on the brink of letting his façade fall, he heard Jack's voice.


	7. Chapter 7

As Yusei travelled to Satellite with the other signers, he made a choice. He thought back to what Jack had said, and he thought about his friends, and he thought about the countless lives resting upon the shoulders of he and the other signers. If he couldn't cut himself, he would focus on the battle ahead of him. He wouldn't let his thoughts drag him down and cause him to slice the knife across his skin. He would stay strong for the sake of everyone else and protect them.

He wouldn't do it again.

He would stop.


End file.
